In the military, men and women are trained to possess special skills that make them very valuable in the defense of our nation. These are things the average American cannot do. As a Mom I’ve discovered that I too have special skills that no one in my family seems to possess. Here is my list:

Ability to successfully engage toilet paper roll equipment

Avoid pet casualties by providing daily nutrients

Detect when someone is lying

Seek out and confiscate stolen/borrowed items belonging to me

Eavesdrop on covert operations from behind closed doors

Diffuse incoming verbal attacks with quick “grounding” retaliation

Track dirt to it’s origin

Transport soldiers from other troops  back to their campground via the company “Van”

Execute orders from the senior officer, especially as it relates to vacation plans

Create alliances with other unit officers (parents) regarding what our troops watch and where they go

Tactical Control regarding all daily plans for little soldiers

Root out and destroy all terrorist attacks upon our unit (often found in the media)

Interrupt friendly fire, especially when “we were just playing operations” get out of hand

So, there you have it. I think all Moms have these. What are your special skills? I’d love to hear. Email me using the Contact Lynne button.  Meanwhile, have a great Fourth of July. Let’s remind our children to say a prayer for those with the real skills, who fight for our freedom everyday.

God Bless America!

My kids fight, my house is often a mess, and our family vacations are both fun and challenging..welcome to real living. For some reason we Moms struggle to be authentic. We falsely believe that everyone else has it all together and we alone are treading water in the ocean of life. Nothing could be further from the truth. Like Hannah Montana sings, “Everybody makes mistakes, everybody has those days ah yeah.” So why not shed a pound or two and let God carry the load? He’s more than willing to take us exactly as we are. I bet our family is too.

I recently wrote an article about living honestly at home check it out here

Blessings,

Lynne

Danger Will Robinson!

Robot must have been talking about the movie Land of the Lost, staring Will Farrell. Too bad the screenplay didn’t stay lost. Check out my review on ChristianCinema.com

-Lynne

The kids are out of school and it’s time to jump into Summer fun! Ice Cream, Swimming, Sleepovers, Camping, Staying up late and sleeping in, ah I can hardly wait.

Of course if left to ourselves the fun runs out and irritations can run high, so I’ve asked both of my children to set some Summer goals. David is planning to finish a series of books and Cassie is going to donate more time at the rest home, and prepare for a California exit exam, that by coincidence shares her name “the CASSIE exam.” I have goals too. I’m tying to be less structured and more fun. Strange that doesn’t come natural anymore? I’m also finishing a novel I’ve been penning for some time.

Be sure and visit my website. There’s a new article about Dads for this month, of course a new audio devotional each week, and I’ve added a Radio page, featuring my interviews with Dr. Bill Meier at Focus on the Family.

Let the Watermelon Festival Begin!!!

Blessings,

Lynne

Click here for the latest interview with Dr. Meier and me on Focus Weekend. Also, click here to read posted articles on the Focus site for how to get your child into the B-I-B-L-E, BIBLE!! (I love that song).

Blessings,

Lynne

Wow! What a whirlwind week. On Thursday I hung out with Carleigh and Dave on radio station KAMB-Celebration Radio 101.5 and offered some Mother’s Day package ideas. It was a blast. I was able to give away three of my books to winning callers, very fun. Saturday my family took my mom and I out for our Mother’s Day dinner at Japanese Kitchen. Then on Sunday I delivered the morning message at Celebration Chrisitan Fellowship Church in Clovis, California. Since I’m originally from Clovis I was able to connect with some great friends from my youthful, silly days. Below are some of the photos from those events.

Also my interview with Dr. Bill Meier ran on the Focus on the Family Weekend radio show. You can click here to listen. (I’m about 16 minutes in).

I hope your Mother’s Day was just as fun. Today it’s back to the daily gifts that God pours upon my life and the lives of my family. Keep your hands open as God rains down his blessings upon YOU!

-Lynne

One of the Mothers Day Hawaii at home package ideas includes SPAM

Dave Benton, Me, Carleigh Arnold (who has a blow up jacuzzi at home)

Lynne presents Mothers Day message at Celebration Christian Fellowship

Daryl Austin, Me, and Kelly Austin, He took my brother and me to see Alien, our first scary movie

Yes, that's Me with Joe Lavagnino, Senior Pastor at Celebration Christian Fellowship. There are just too many childhood stories to tell: The Pinto, Cookie the Car, Ditching me in a parking lot... the list just goes on.

Pam Lavagnino, the Saint who married my strange friend.

My hubby, Pete, and Mike Colvard. I dont even want to know what they did as kids.

Jona Cook, Me, and Barry Younkin. I don't think Barry's ever recovered from the TP job we did on his house as kids. Barry This Ones For You.

Me and Carol Cook. Shes the sane one.

Me and Marty Blackwell. Can you say musical genius?

Listen in on KAMB 101.5 tomorrow morning (Thursday, May 7) at 7AM and hear Carleigh and I chat about “all things mom.” I have some cool Mother’s Day gift ideas to share, and will give away some books to winning callers. If you’re not in the Merced/Modesto area you can listen online at

http://www.celebrationradio.com/pages/page.asp?page_id=32178

Be sure and email me after the show. I love feedback. For instance–What would you like to hear on the radio about mom life?

Blessings, Lynne

Congratulations to Dee and Melany for winning my “Best Mother’s Day” story contest. Melany won because her story made me laugh, and Dee won because anyone who survived that kind of a Mother’s Day without a permanent twitch deserves something. Both women will be receiving a signed copy of my book, The Official Soccer Mom Devotional, an e-copy of my teen book, Wag the Mouth, and a Starbucks card. Happy Mother’s Day ladies and thanks for sharing! Here are the winning stories below:

Mother’s Day Memory

by Melany

One year when the kids were little my husband allowed each of the kids to select a gift for me on Mother’s Day. Zach chose a blue necklace and Josh chose weiner dog earrings. I can’t say why - I don’t like weiner dogs.  Of course I wore the ugly little dogs on my ears every so often. This past year, I went to my son Josh’s high school group Mother’s Day celebration. The MC asked who had received the worst Mother’s Day gift. There was a dead silence as all the ‘good moms’ would never say they’d received a ‘bad’ gift. Josh whispered into my ear, “Weiner dog” and I raised my hand and told about my earrings. We won the prize - a lovely spa kit. Josh was bragging about how he had given me the best gift. I still had the earrings - so I wore them to church the following Sunday.

Mother’s Day Memory

by Dee

My most memorable Mother’s Day was celebrated in 2004.  A seemingly spur-of-the-moment idea, Mark and the kids decided I needed a nice picnic lunch up in the mountains.  Great idea!  Very me and very wonderful.  I was all for it.  I should have gotten a clue as too how unplanned this event was when we got home and leftover pretzels, potato chips, a package of lunch meat, a chunk of cheese, and water bottles were slung into the back of the SUV.  Included in the packing list were a smelly tarp, an old blanket and some guns for squirrel hunting.  Remember, this is supposed to be Mother’s Day…my day.  We head out to the canyon a few miles from the house and begin winding our way toward Lake Isabella next to the foaming Kern River .

My husband being my husband, we had to find the most remote, least populated place on the planet, so we took a dirt path called “ Cow Flat Road .”  After a few wrong turns – which included carefully backing the 4-Runner off a foot path scaling the side of a mountain – we set up our “picnic” in a mountain meadow.  Out came the guns and the squirrel shoot began.  Across a small ravine a group of cows gathered to watch our progress.  I guess they wanted to spend their Mother’s Day uniquely, as well.

The blazing sun, late hour of the day and lack of water – our limited supply quickly ran out – forcing us back into the car to continue our trek.  Instead of heading back the way we came we decided to travel on because “the road has to come out somewhere…”  Actually, Mark knew where it came out.  He just misjudged the amount of time it would take to get there.  By hours. We rumbled slowly across the rocky, dry, narrow mountain road.  Excitement to be had in all facets of the trip, at one point we drove over a rattlesnake that wasn’t injured and had opportunity to climb up into our wheel well.

When it was dark, our snack food gone and we finally arrived in Bodfish. Mark told us we would have a nice meal in a little diner he knew of.  (First stopping off in the nearby park so the kids could play on the memorial tank and cannon displayed there…)  Upon arriving at said diner, not only was the restaurant about to close, it also didn’t take Visa.  I didn’t have my purse.  Mark’s wallet was about as bare as Mother Hubbard’s cupboard.  We scrounged together what change we could.  The four of us had shakes and a serving of fries to share.  We headed home – taking the FREEWAY this time and put two very happy children to bed.

Squirrel hunting, rattlesnakes, heat stroke and starvation are not my idea of the perfect Mother’s Day celebration.  But, I must say, I will never forget it.